1 00:00:03,603 --> 00:00:05,237 - Please, mom! 2 00:00:05,238 --> 00:00:09,842 - Dennis, if I do, will you promise to stop pestering me? 3 00:00:09,843 --> 00:00:10,809 - Sure! 4 00:00:10,810 --> 00:00:13,512 - All right. 5 00:00:13,513 --> 00:00:16,015 - Tell him one of them isn't even mine. 6 00:00:16,016 --> 00:00:19,551 And tell him I looked all over, and that 7 00:00:19,552 --> 00:00:22,187 must be the place they are. And tell him-- 8 00:00:22,188 --> 00:00:23,822 - Henry Mitchell, please. 9 00:00:23,823 --> 00:00:25,691 Now, remember, you promised. 10 00:00:25,692 --> 00:00:26,859 Henry, Alice. 11 00:00:26,860 --> 00:00:28,694 - Hi honey, what's up? 12 00:00:28,695 --> 00:00:31,030 - Henry, would you look and see if there 13 00:00:31,031 --> 00:00:32,832 are a couple of frogs in your briefcase? 14 00:00:39,973 --> 00:00:41,540 - What? 15 00:00:41,541 --> 00:00:43,476 [music playing] 16 00:01:12,072 --> 00:01:13,072 - Dennis! 17 00:01:13,073 --> 00:01:14,940 Your duck's in my garden again. 18 00:01:14,941 --> 00:01:17,943 - I'll get it Mr. Wilson. 19 00:01:17,944 --> 00:01:19,478 I want that Duck kept out of here. 20 00:01:19,479 --> 00:01:21,680 How many times must I tell you that? 21 00:01:21,681 --> 00:01:25,284 - Jeepers, I guess he just likes it over here. 22 00:01:25,285 --> 00:01:26,618 - I'll say he likes it. 23 00:01:26,619 --> 00:01:29,755 According to that duck, my yard's a cafeteria. 24 00:01:29,756 --> 00:01:30,789 Look at him. 25 00:01:30,790 --> 00:01:31,991 He's eating all my seedlings. 26 00:01:32,092 --> 00:01:35,594 - I'll get him, Mr. Wilson. 27 00:01:35,595 --> 00:01:37,130 [quacking] 28 00:01:41,401 --> 00:01:43,369 - Hey, why don't me and you train him to eat weeds? 29 00:01:43,370 --> 00:01:45,371 Why don't we do that, huh? 30 00:01:45,372 --> 00:01:48,841 - No, I don't like that duck/ And I don't want him around here. 31 00:01:48,842 --> 00:01:51,944 - Does it still hurt you where he bit you this morning? 32 00:01:51,945 --> 00:01:53,278 - Yes, it does. 33 00:01:53,279 --> 00:01:56,148 - Why don't you try sitting on a pillow. 34 00:01:56,149 --> 00:01:58,317 - After I talk to your father, young man, 35 00:01:58,318 --> 00:02:00,652 you're the one that's going to need the pillow. 36 00:02:00,653 --> 00:02:02,155 [music playing] 37 00:02:08,595 --> 00:02:11,130 - You got to stop biting people, George. 38 00:02:11,131 --> 00:02:14,066 Mr. Wilson was plenty mad. 39 00:02:14,067 --> 00:02:17,636 [quacking] 40 00:02:17,637 --> 00:02:18,303 - Shh! 41 00:02:18,304 --> 00:02:19,538 Mom might here you. 42 00:02:19,539 --> 00:02:21,707 And I got to sneak you upstairs again. 43 00:02:21,708 --> 00:02:23,643 [music playing] 44 00:02:39,592 --> 00:02:40,527 - Is that you, Dennis? 45 00:02:45,965 --> 00:02:49,301 - Yes, Mom! 46 00:02:49,302 --> 00:02:54,106 - Dennis, what have I told you about your roller skates? 47 00:02:54,107 --> 00:02:56,108 - You told me not to skate in the street. 48 00:02:56,109 --> 00:02:57,576 - Well, that too. 49 00:02:57,577 --> 00:03:00,045 But I also told you not to leave them 50 00:03:00,046 --> 00:03:01,647 in the middle of the back porch. 51 00:03:01,648 --> 00:03:03,215 - Oh. 52 00:03:03,216 --> 00:03:05,952 - Now, you go right out there and put them away. 53 00:03:06,052 --> 00:03:08,187 - You mean the next time I go out that way. 54 00:03:08,188 --> 00:03:11,790 - I mean right now. 55 00:03:11,791 --> 00:03:13,960 - Aren't you coming with me? 56 00:03:14,060 --> 00:03:16,496 - Well, no, I have the vacuuming to do. 57 00:03:19,699 --> 00:03:22,835 - Do I hear something boiling over in the kitchen? 58 00:03:22,836 --> 00:03:24,371 - Oh my goodness! 59 00:03:29,776 --> 00:03:33,112 - I'm home! 60 00:03:33,113 --> 00:03:34,146 Oh, hi, son. 61 00:03:34,147 --> 00:03:35,248 How's my boy? 62 00:03:37,784 --> 00:03:39,352 - Jeepers, you're home early. 63 00:03:42,155 --> 00:03:44,089 I bet you want to tell Mom about your game. 64 00:03:44,090 --> 00:03:45,457 She's in the kitchen. 65 00:03:45,458 --> 00:03:49,395 - Dennis, there was nothing boiling-- oh, hi dear. 66 00:03:49,396 --> 00:03:50,929 - Hi, honey. - How was your game? 67 00:03:50,930 --> 00:03:53,198 - Miserable, I was so hot we could only play nine holes. 68 00:03:53,199 --> 00:03:55,134 - You know what I found out? 69 00:03:55,135 --> 00:03:57,469 It's a lot cooler in the basement. 70 00:03:57,470 --> 00:03:59,872 Why don't you and Mom go down there and cool off for a while? 71 00:03:59,873 --> 00:04:01,040 - No, thanks. 72 00:04:01,041 --> 00:04:02,842 I'll go in and relax on the sofa. 73 00:04:05,578 --> 00:04:09,048 - Dennis, what did I tell you about your skates? 74 00:04:09,049 --> 00:04:11,050 - But Mom! 75 00:04:11,051 --> 00:04:13,485 - Right now. 76 00:04:13,486 --> 00:04:13,787 - OK. 77 00:04:21,928 --> 00:04:24,296 - Are you gonna run that old vacuum 78 00:04:24,297 --> 00:04:27,800 while Dad's trying to get some peace and quiet around here? 79 00:04:27,801 --> 00:04:30,769 - That's all right, honey. 80 00:04:30,770 --> 00:04:32,538 - No, Dennis is right. 81 00:04:32,539 --> 00:04:34,106 I just wasn't thinking. Come on, Dennis. 82 00:04:34,107 --> 00:04:36,675 - Thank you, honey. 83 00:04:36,676 --> 00:04:39,845 - Gosh, poor old Mom. 84 00:04:39,846 --> 00:04:44,350 I bet her back hurts from carrying all that heavy stuff. 85 00:04:44,351 --> 00:04:46,719 Doing the wash, and ironing, and scrubbing 86 00:04:46,720 --> 00:04:50,222 the floor, and all that stuff. 87 00:04:50,223 --> 00:04:52,891 - Honey, let me carry that for you. 88 00:04:52,892 --> 00:04:54,860 - Thank you, dear. 89 00:04:54,861 --> 00:04:56,830 [music playing] 90 00:05:03,503 --> 00:05:04,803 [quacking] 91 00:05:04,804 --> 00:05:07,773 - Shh! 92 00:05:07,774 --> 00:05:09,775 [music playing] 93 00:05:09,776 --> 00:05:17,549 MR. WILSON 94 00:05:17,550 --> 00:05:19,752 I've been waiting for you to get home! 95 00:05:19,753 --> 00:05:20,753 - What on Earth? 96 00:05:20,754 --> 00:05:21,721 - Come on in, Mr. Wilson! 97 00:05:24,791 --> 00:05:28,727 [yelling] 98 00:05:28,728 --> 00:05:30,129 - Oh my goodness! 99 00:05:30,130 --> 00:05:32,598 - Are you all right, Mr. Wilson? 100 00:05:32,599 --> 00:05:33,666 - I ought to sue you. 101 00:05:33,667 --> 00:05:35,401 I really ought to sue you, Mitchell. 102 00:05:35,402 --> 00:05:37,536 - Oh, now Mr. Wilson. - But I won't. 103 00:05:37,537 --> 00:05:38,337 You know why? 104 00:05:38,338 --> 00:05:39,905 Because I'm sorry for you. 105 00:05:39,906 --> 00:05:41,173 You have to live with him. 106 00:05:41,174 --> 00:05:43,575 - Oh, Mr. Wilson, we're so terribly sorry. 107 00:05:43,576 --> 00:05:45,511 - What kind of a place is this to leave roller skates? 108 00:05:45,512 --> 00:05:47,279 Why don't you have him put them away? 109 00:05:47,280 --> 00:05:49,848 - I've told him, and told him to put them away. 110 00:05:49,849 --> 00:05:54,720 - Come on in, Mr. Wilson. 111 00:05:54,721 --> 00:05:56,655 - Oh, for heaven's sake. 112 00:05:56,656 --> 00:05:59,491 Oh, look at this. 113 00:05:59,492 --> 00:06:02,327 Oh, Martha gave that to me on our last wedding anniversary. 114 00:06:02,328 --> 00:06:04,196 It was the coolest pipe I ever owned. 115 00:06:04,197 --> 00:06:05,932 - I'm sorry about that, Mr. Wilson. 116 00:06:06,032 --> 00:06:07,766 I'd like to pay for a new one. 117 00:06:07,767 --> 00:06:09,268 - Oh, sure, that's easy to say. 118 00:06:09,269 --> 00:06:10,769 Then I'd have to break it in. 119 00:06:10,770 --> 00:06:13,038 - I don't know what else I can do. 120 00:06:13,039 --> 00:06:14,239 - Well, you can do one thing. 121 00:06:14,240 --> 00:06:16,542 You can keep that duck out of my yard. 122 00:06:16,543 --> 00:06:17,409 - Duck? 123 00:06:17,410 --> 00:06:18,711 - What duck? 124 00:06:18,712 --> 00:06:21,280 - Dennis' duck. 125 00:06:21,281 --> 00:06:23,649 - I think you'd better sit down, Mr. Wilson. 126 00:06:23,650 --> 00:06:25,185 - Oh, thank you. 127 00:06:28,722 --> 00:06:32,691 Well, what are you going to do about the duck. 128 00:06:32,692 --> 00:06:36,628 - Frankly, Mr. Wilson, we don't know what you're talking about. 129 00:06:36,629 --> 00:06:38,697 - I'm talking about Dennis' duck, the one he's 130 00:06:38,698 --> 00:06:41,533 been carrying around the neighborhood for the last three 131 00:06:41,534 --> 00:06:44,336 or four days. 132 00:06:44,337 --> 00:06:47,106 - I think you must be mistaken, Mr. Wilson. 133 00:06:47,107 --> 00:06:48,941 - Well, I certainly haven't seen it. 134 00:06:48,942 --> 00:06:50,442 - You haven't seen it? 135 00:06:50,443 --> 00:06:52,378 He carries it around in a carton. 136 00:06:52,379 --> 00:06:55,481 I've seen him carry the carton into this house. 137 00:06:55,482 --> 00:06:58,250 - I assure you, Mr. Wilson, if Dennis has been keeping a duck, 138 00:06:58,251 --> 00:07:00,052 we'd know about it. 139 00:07:00,053 --> 00:07:02,087 - You've had a bad fall, Mr. Wilson. 140 00:07:02,088 --> 00:07:03,255 And perhaps-- 141 00:07:03,256 --> 00:07:05,724 - I am not suffering from concussion. 142 00:07:05,725 --> 00:07:08,027 Why, that duck even bit me. 143 00:07:08,028 --> 00:07:10,062 I was working on my tuberous begonias 144 00:07:10,063 --> 00:07:13,232 and he bit me on my back pocket. 145 00:07:13,233 --> 00:07:15,200 - I'm sorry he bit you, Mr. Wilson, but-- 146 00:07:15,201 --> 00:07:17,803 - And then when I tried to drive him off with my rake, 147 00:07:17,804 --> 00:07:20,172 he snarled at me. 148 00:07:20,173 --> 00:07:21,774 - Ducks don't snarl, Mr. Wilson. 149 00:07:21,775 --> 00:07:23,542 They quack. 150 00:07:23,543 --> 00:07:25,044 - This one snarls. 151 00:07:25,045 --> 00:07:27,179 And he's been trying to get at my goldfish. 152 00:07:27,180 --> 00:07:29,348 Why, he even attacked, Fremont. 153 00:07:29,349 --> 00:07:31,183 That poor dog hid under the porch 154 00:07:31,184 --> 00:07:33,752 until Dennis came and got the duck. 155 00:07:33,753 --> 00:07:35,521 - Be reasonable, Mr. Wilson. 156 00:07:35,522 --> 00:07:37,456 If this duck is as vicious as you say, 157 00:07:37,457 --> 00:07:40,125 how could a little boy like Dennis handle him? 158 00:07:40,126 --> 00:07:41,260 - I don't know. 159 00:07:41,261 --> 00:07:42,695 There's something weird about it. 160 00:07:42,696 --> 00:07:44,964 I think Dennis and that duck can communicate. 161 00:07:45,065 --> 00:07:48,334 - Boy, there's sure a lot of noise. 162 00:07:48,335 --> 00:07:52,838 Whoops, I'm going to go pick up my room. 163 00:07:52,839 --> 00:07:54,239 - Dennis, come back here. 164 00:07:54,240 --> 00:07:55,607 - Mom asked me to do it, Dad. 165 00:07:55,608 --> 00:07:57,576 And I just haven't gotten around to it. 166 00:07:57,577 --> 00:08:00,045 - You also haven't gotten around to picking up 167 00:08:00,046 --> 00:08:01,113 your roller skates. 168 00:08:01,114 --> 00:08:02,548 And Mr. Wilson fell over them. 169 00:08:02,549 --> 00:08:07,019 - Gee, I'm sorry you fell over my skates, Mr. Wilson. 170 00:08:07,020 --> 00:08:10,089 - Dennis, do you know anything about a duck? 171 00:08:10,090 --> 00:08:12,658 - You mean do they lay eggs? 172 00:08:12,659 --> 00:08:15,060 - I mean do you have one? 173 00:08:15,061 --> 00:08:16,628 - A duck? - Yeah. 174 00:08:16,629 --> 00:08:17,629 - What color? 175 00:08:17,630 --> 00:08:18,630 - Any color. 176 00:08:18,631 --> 00:08:20,599 - It's white. 177 00:08:20,600 --> 00:08:22,034 - What color feet? 178 00:08:22,035 --> 00:08:23,035 - Yellow. 179 00:08:23,036 --> 00:08:24,303 - Dennis, stop it. 180 00:08:24,304 --> 00:08:27,272 If you have a duck, I want you to say so. 181 00:08:27,273 --> 00:08:29,943 - OK, I guess I have one. - Aha! 182 00:08:30,043 --> 00:08:31,443 You see? 183 00:08:31,444 --> 00:08:34,847 - Where in the world did you get a duck? 184 00:08:34,848 --> 00:08:36,181 - From Charlie Spencer. 185 00:08:36,182 --> 00:08:39,752 He moved to New York and he had this swell 186 00:08:39,753 --> 00:08:41,887 duck left over from last Easter. 187 00:08:41,888 --> 00:08:43,322 So he gave it to me. 188 00:08:43,323 --> 00:08:45,591 - Dennis, you should have asked permission to keep it. 189 00:08:45,592 --> 00:08:46,625 - I started to. 190 00:08:46,626 --> 00:08:48,293 Don't you remember? 191 00:08:48,294 --> 00:08:50,429 You were in the living room reading the paper. 192 00:08:50,430 --> 00:08:53,198 And I said, Dad, do you like ducks? 193 00:08:53,199 --> 00:08:58,070 And you said, they're delicious. 194 00:08:58,071 --> 00:09:00,072 - Is that why you kept it a secret? 195 00:09:00,073 --> 00:09:03,108 - Sure, I didn't want Dad to eat him. 196 00:09:03,109 --> 00:09:05,878 - Son, you know we wouldn't eat a pet duck. 197 00:09:05,879 --> 00:09:08,013 - Huh, I would. 198 00:09:08,014 --> 00:09:09,181 - Jeepers! 199 00:09:09,182 --> 00:09:10,249 I want you to like him, Mr. Wilson. 200 00:09:10,250 --> 00:09:13,152 You know what I named him? 201 00:09:13,153 --> 00:09:15,120 George, after you. 202 00:09:15,121 --> 00:09:17,189 - I don't want it named after me. 203 00:09:17,190 --> 00:09:20,092 - You're my best friend, Mr. Wilson. 204 00:09:20,093 --> 00:09:23,328 - I don't want to be your best friend. 205 00:09:23,329 --> 00:09:25,664 - Don't you like me, Mr. Wilson? 206 00:09:25,665 --> 00:09:28,467 - Oh, sure, Dennis. 207 00:09:28,468 --> 00:09:30,035 You're a nice kid. 208 00:09:30,036 --> 00:09:33,138 I mean, you're not malicious, I don't think. 209 00:09:33,139 --> 00:09:35,240 It's just that you're such a jinx. 210 00:09:35,241 --> 00:09:37,676 Every time you show up there's chaos. 211 00:09:37,677 --> 00:09:39,946 And I'm not a young man, Dennis. 212 00:09:40,046 --> 00:09:42,081 And I can't stand it. 213 00:09:42,082 --> 00:09:44,650 - I've been saving a feather for you. 214 00:09:44,651 --> 00:09:45,617 - What? 215 00:09:45,618 --> 00:09:46,453 - It's to put in your hat. 216 00:09:50,190 --> 00:09:56,295 - Well, now, well, thank you, Dennis. 217 00:09:56,296 --> 00:09:58,364 You're a nice little boy. 218 00:09:58,365 --> 00:10:02,201 But you just keep that duck out of my yard. 219 00:10:02,202 --> 00:10:04,537 - We'll see that he does, Mr. Wilson. 220 00:10:08,008 --> 00:10:09,641 - You know, I don't know why it is. 221 00:10:09,642 --> 00:10:12,811 But I always come out of these things with the feeling 222 00:10:12,812 --> 00:10:14,114 that I've lost. 223 00:10:16,483 --> 00:10:19,618 - Did you pick up the other skate? 224 00:10:19,619 --> 00:10:21,588 [yelling] 225 00:10:29,963 --> 00:10:32,098 [music playing] 226 00:10:36,936 --> 00:10:39,104 - Well, there we are, Dennis. 227 00:10:39,105 --> 00:10:41,040 I'm sure George will be a lot happier here 228 00:10:41,041 --> 00:10:42,641 than he was up in your closet. 229 00:10:42,642 --> 00:10:44,043 - He sure is, boy! 230 00:10:44,044 --> 00:10:47,613 Good old George thinks this is swell, don't you George? 231 00:10:47,614 --> 00:10:48,480 [quacking] 232 00:10:48,481 --> 00:10:49,848 - Dennis, there's just one thing I 233 00:10:49,849 --> 00:10:51,083 want you to be sure you understand. 234 00:10:51,084 --> 00:10:53,519 That duck must not leave our property. 235 00:10:53,520 --> 00:10:58,123 So be very careful and keep this gate closed. 236 00:10:58,124 --> 00:11:01,493 - OK, Dad, I'll be real careful with him. 237 00:11:01,494 --> 00:11:04,129 - Especially be careful that he doesn't bother Mr. Wilson. 238 00:11:04,130 --> 00:11:05,464 You know how upset he got. 239 00:11:05,465 --> 00:11:08,867 - Yeah, he sure fell down, didn't he? 240 00:11:08,868 --> 00:11:10,102 - I don't mean that. 241 00:11:10,103 --> 00:11:12,171 I meant about the duck. 242 00:11:12,172 --> 00:11:14,940 By the way, what have you been doing about food for George? 243 00:11:14,941 --> 00:11:17,843 - I've been giving him snails. 244 00:11:17,844 --> 00:11:19,578 - What? 245 00:11:19,579 --> 00:11:22,181 - Old Charlie Spencer says that's their favorite recipe. 246 00:11:22,182 --> 00:11:24,083 So I tried them out and George just loves them. 247 00:11:24,084 --> 00:11:28,253 I got a whole box of them over by the fence. 248 00:11:28,254 --> 00:11:29,521 - You better go get some. 249 00:11:29,522 --> 00:11:31,457 - I think it's about George's lunch time. 250 00:11:31,458 --> 00:11:32,858 - OK. 251 00:11:32,859 --> 00:11:34,794 [music playing] 252 00:11:41,468 --> 00:11:43,235 - Jeepers, Dad! 253 00:11:43,236 --> 00:11:47,139 The box was tipped over and all of them ran away! 254 00:11:47,140 --> 00:11:48,707 Every one of them! 255 00:11:48,708 --> 00:11:50,809 - I guess you'll just have to go out and collect some more. 256 00:11:50,810 --> 00:11:52,444 - You want to help me? 257 00:11:52,445 --> 00:11:54,813 - Sorry, son, I still have my newspaper to read. 258 00:11:54,814 --> 00:11:55,848 - OK. 259 00:11:55,849 --> 00:11:57,583 Thanks for building the fence. 260 00:11:57,584 --> 00:11:59,119 - That's all right. 261 00:12:02,889 --> 00:12:04,423 - You hungry, George? 262 00:12:04,424 --> 00:12:05,724 [quacking] 263 00:12:05,725 --> 00:12:11,064 - OK, I'll get you some food just as fast as I can. 264 00:12:17,570 --> 00:12:20,439 - Martha, there's the most astonishing thing 265 00:12:20,440 --> 00:12:21,273 in our backyard. 266 00:12:21,274 --> 00:12:22,675 I went out to feed the goldfish. 267 00:12:22,676 --> 00:12:26,512 And I found a great, huge milling mass of snails. 268 00:12:26,513 --> 00:12:28,681 - What's so astonishing about that? 269 00:12:28,682 --> 00:12:31,150 You've been finding them in the yard for years. 270 00:12:31,151 --> 00:12:34,853 - Oh, Martha, I love you for your womanly qualities. 271 00:12:34,854 --> 00:12:37,556 But you haven't a scientific mind. 272 00:12:37,557 --> 00:12:39,591 When do I find them? 273 00:12:39,592 --> 00:12:42,895 - Why, in the evening, when they come out and eat your plants. 274 00:12:42,896 --> 00:12:44,663 - Precisely, my dear. 275 00:12:44,664 --> 00:12:48,001 And in our backyard, I have discovered a new species 276 00:12:48,101 --> 00:12:49,368 that comes out in the hot sun. 277 00:12:49,369 --> 00:12:51,970 And furthermore, they travel in herds. 278 00:12:51,971 --> 00:12:53,439 - Oh, George, really. 279 00:12:53,440 --> 00:12:55,407 - I intend to write a scientific paper 280 00:12:55,408 --> 00:12:57,109 to read before the garden club. 281 00:12:57,110 --> 00:12:59,144 - Well, how can you write a scientific paper 282 00:12:59,145 --> 00:13:00,479 when you haven't the evidence? 283 00:13:00,480 --> 00:13:03,248 - But Martha, my dear, I have the evidence. 284 00:13:03,249 --> 00:13:05,251 In our backyard, there are hundreds of snails. 285 00:13:06,052 --> 00:13:08,587 And they are traveling in a herd. 286 00:13:08,588 --> 00:13:10,122 - Nonsense. 287 00:13:10,123 --> 00:13:12,959 - At this very moment, they're over by the fence grazing. 288 00:13:13,059 --> 00:13:15,728 I've got to hurry. 289 00:13:15,729 --> 00:13:17,329 - Where are you going? 290 00:13:17,330 --> 00:13:19,565 - I'm going to collect my light meter, tripod, portrait camera, 291 00:13:19,566 --> 00:13:23,635 film, and filters, go out in the yard, and record the evidence. 292 00:13:23,636 --> 00:13:26,172 [quacking] 293 00:13:36,282 --> 00:13:39,518 - Martha, I want to be sure these pictures turn out. 294 00:13:39,519 --> 00:13:42,354 So I'm using a very expensive film. 295 00:13:42,355 --> 00:13:45,891 It's a ultra fine grain super panchromatic quadruple 296 00:13:45,892 --> 00:13:48,127 x high speed. 297 00:13:48,128 --> 00:13:50,496 - High speed for snails? 298 00:13:50,497 --> 00:13:54,099 - Oh, it's technical, Martha, you wouldn't understand. 299 00:13:54,100 --> 00:13:56,835 Why, this film is so sensitive you can practically 300 00:13:56,836 --> 00:13:58,437 take pictures in the dark. 301 00:13:58,438 --> 00:14:01,807 To load my camera, I have to go in the closet. 302 00:14:01,808 --> 00:14:06,679 I tell you, the slightest ray of light could ruin it. 303 00:14:06,680 --> 00:14:08,181 [door bell] 304 00:14:11,484 --> 00:14:12,785 - Hi, Mrs. Wilson. 305 00:14:12,786 --> 00:14:14,053 Is Mr. Wilson home? 306 00:14:14,054 --> 00:14:16,755 - Yes, Dennis, come in. 307 00:14:16,756 --> 00:14:19,892 - He's in the closet. 308 00:14:19,893 --> 00:14:22,861 - He is? 309 00:14:22,862 --> 00:14:27,566 Hey, Mr. Wilson, olly, olly oxen free! 310 00:14:27,567 --> 00:14:30,469 MR. WILSON (OFFSCREEN): Oh no. - He isn't hiding, Dennis. 311 00:14:30,470 --> 00:14:32,972 - Are you looking for your overcoat, Mr. Wilson? 312 00:14:33,073 --> 00:14:34,873 MR. WILSON (OFFSCREEN): No. 313 00:14:34,874 --> 00:14:36,575 - Your bowling ball? 314 00:14:36,576 --> 00:14:39,178 MR. WILSON (OFFSCREEN): No, I'm not looking for anything. 315 00:14:39,179 --> 00:14:41,280 - Are you sulking? 316 00:14:41,281 --> 00:14:44,149 MR. WILSON (OFFSCREEN): Great Scott. 317 00:14:44,150 --> 00:14:47,252 I'm loading my camera in the dark. 318 00:14:47,253 --> 00:14:48,087 - Oh. 319 00:14:48,088 --> 00:14:50,622 Is this better? 320 00:14:50,623 --> 00:14:52,192 [yelling] 321 00:14:56,096 --> 00:14:57,997 - He did it again. 322 00:14:58,098 --> 00:15:00,199 - It happened so fast I couldn't stop it. 323 00:15:00,200 --> 00:15:02,034 - What's this, Mr. Wilson? 324 00:15:02,035 --> 00:15:05,838 - That was a $3.80 roll of film. 325 00:15:05,839 --> 00:15:07,639 - You got cheated. 326 00:15:07,640 --> 00:15:10,709 None of your pictures came out. 327 00:15:10,710 --> 00:15:12,311 - Dennis, what do you want? 328 00:15:12,312 --> 00:15:16,048 - Mr. Wilson, is it OK if I go out in your yard and hunt for-- 329 00:15:16,049 --> 00:15:17,616 - Absolutely not! 330 00:15:17,617 --> 00:15:19,485 You're not even going to set foot in my yard. 331 00:15:19,486 --> 00:15:22,421 - OK, I guess you're afraid I'll step 332 00:15:22,422 --> 00:15:25,057 in the flower beds, huh, Mr. Wilson? 333 00:15:25,058 --> 00:15:27,092 - No, that isn't it. 334 00:15:27,093 --> 00:15:29,395 - Oh, then maybe because it's so hot, 335 00:15:29,396 --> 00:15:30,929 you're afraid I might go swimming 336 00:15:30,930 --> 00:15:33,599 in your fish pond again? 337 00:15:33,600 --> 00:15:36,770 - Just get rid of him and then go bring me my nerve medicine. 338 00:15:39,472 --> 00:15:47,079 Super panchromatic, quadruple x, $3.80 worth. 339 00:15:47,080 --> 00:15:48,514 Martha, will you hurry? 340 00:15:48,515 --> 00:15:49,682 Come on! 341 00:15:49,683 --> 00:15:51,517 I want to take them when the light's good. 342 00:15:51,518 --> 00:15:53,352 - I don't see why you really need me. 343 00:15:53,353 --> 00:15:54,953 - Because I want to get the focus perfect. 344 00:15:54,954 --> 00:15:57,089 You can hold one end of the tape measure. 345 00:15:57,090 --> 00:16:01,226 I-- Martha, the duck! 346 00:16:01,227 --> 00:16:02,729 He's eating the snails! 347 00:16:05,265 --> 00:16:09,435 [quacking] - Shoo! 348 00:16:09,436 --> 00:16:10,436 Go on! 349 00:16:10,437 --> 00:16:12,371 Get out of here! 350 00:16:12,372 --> 00:16:15,040 [quacking] 351 00:16:15,041 --> 00:16:17,743 - And so the duck has just got to go. 352 00:16:17,744 --> 00:16:19,311 - Now, Mr. Wilson. 353 00:16:19,312 --> 00:16:21,948 - Now, let me just run over what that duck has done. 354 00:16:22,048 --> 00:16:23,816 He dug holes in my lawn. 355 00:16:23,817 --> 00:16:24,817 He bit me. 356 00:16:24,818 --> 00:16:26,085 He ate most of my goldfish. 357 00:16:26,086 --> 00:16:28,253 He's made a nervous wreck out of my dog. 358 00:16:28,254 --> 00:16:31,623 And he robbed me the presidency of the garden club. 359 00:16:31,624 --> 00:16:33,225 - What? 360 00:16:33,226 --> 00:16:35,661 - I was going to write a paper on a scientific curiosity which 361 00:16:35,662 --> 00:16:37,629 would have given me great standing as a gardener 362 00:16:37,630 --> 00:16:39,164 and naturalist. 363 00:16:39,165 --> 00:16:42,868 Before I could do it, that blasted duck ate the evidence. 364 00:16:42,869 --> 00:16:45,404 - I'm sorry about that, Mr. Wilson. 365 00:16:45,405 --> 00:16:49,074 Honey, I guess we'll just have to get rid of it. 366 00:16:49,075 --> 00:16:51,377 - Couldn't we give the duck just one more chance? 367 00:16:51,378 --> 00:16:53,512 I'm sure Dennis will keep it locked up. 368 00:16:53,513 --> 00:16:55,080 - Now, Mrs. Mitchell, maybe I didn't 369 00:16:55,081 --> 00:16:57,082 make quite clear the extent of the damage. 370 00:16:57,083 --> 00:16:59,284 Now, those goldfish were very valuable. 371 00:16:59,285 --> 00:17:02,287 I bred them myself and raised them from the eggs. 372 00:17:02,288 --> 00:17:03,655 Now, there were only couple left. 373 00:17:03,656 --> 00:17:05,158 And I don't want to lose those. 374 00:17:07,460 --> 00:17:11,563 - All right, Mr. Wilson, I guess we'll have to get rid of it. 375 00:17:11,564 --> 00:17:13,133 [music playing] 376 00:17:25,178 --> 00:17:29,081 - All I ask is that Dennis understand why it's necessary. 377 00:17:29,082 --> 00:17:30,716 - Tell him the duck is vicious. 378 00:17:30,717 --> 00:17:32,418 - I can't do that. 379 00:17:32,419 --> 00:17:34,853 I'll just explain that the duck will be happier 380 00:17:34,854 --> 00:17:36,155 at the lake and the park. 381 00:17:36,156 --> 00:17:37,723 There will be other ducks around. 382 00:17:37,724 --> 00:17:38,724 - Of course it'll be happier. 383 00:17:38,725 --> 00:17:41,527 And so will I. 384 00:17:41,528 --> 00:17:44,063 - The park is only three blocks away. 385 00:17:44,064 --> 00:17:46,665 Dennis could go to see it. 386 00:17:46,666 --> 00:17:48,801 - Hi! 387 00:17:48,802 --> 00:17:50,069 - Hello, son. 388 00:17:50,070 --> 00:17:53,739 We want to talk to you. 389 00:17:53,740 --> 00:17:56,075 Go ahead. 390 00:17:56,076 --> 00:17:57,510 - You go ahead. 391 00:18:00,080 --> 00:18:03,115 - You tell him, Mr. Wilson. 392 00:18:03,116 --> 00:18:04,684 - He's your son. 393 00:18:07,654 --> 00:18:09,021 - All right. 394 00:18:09,022 --> 00:18:10,589 - Excuse me. 395 00:18:10,590 --> 00:18:14,928 - Boy, there goes the best mom in the whole world, huh Dad? 396 00:18:15,028 --> 00:18:15,929 - That's right, son. 397 00:18:16,029 --> 00:18:17,463 But I-- 398 00:18:17,464 --> 00:18:19,933 - And you know why she's the best mom in the whole world? 399 00:18:20,033 --> 00:18:22,101 Because she's a mom. - All right, son-- 400 00:18:22,102 --> 00:18:26,940 - Moms, do you think they're swell, too? 401 00:18:27,040 --> 00:18:28,307 - Moms. 402 00:18:28,308 --> 00:18:31,143 - I want to talk to you about the duck. 403 00:18:31,144 --> 00:18:33,045 - Oh, you mean George? 404 00:18:33,046 --> 00:18:36,048 I think he's going to be a mother. 405 00:18:36,049 --> 00:18:37,649 He's out there with a whole nest full of eggs. 406 00:18:37,650 --> 00:18:39,585 - What? - Great Scott! 407 00:18:39,586 --> 00:18:42,122 [music playing] 408 00:18:45,258 --> 00:18:47,426 - See, there they are. 409 00:18:47,427 --> 00:18:51,163 - I don't know. 410 00:18:51,164 --> 00:18:54,733 They look awfully small for duck eggs. 411 00:18:54,734 --> 00:18:59,071 - Mr. WIlson, look how many he-- I mean she-- laid. 412 00:18:59,072 --> 00:19:00,773 Under the circumstances, I don't see 413 00:19:00,774 --> 00:19:03,342 how we can move her to the park. 414 00:19:03,343 --> 00:19:06,211 - If that fuck is going to hatch these eggs, 415 00:19:06,212 --> 00:19:09,581 he's going to get frost bitten. Why, they're ice cold. 416 00:19:09,582 --> 00:19:11,016 - They are? 417 00:19:11,017 --> 00:19:14,553 I wonder how George happened to lay ice cold eggs. 418 00:19:14,554 --> 00:19:16,121 - You got these eggs out of the refrigerator, 419 00:19:16,122 --> 00:19:18,891 didn't you Dennis? 420 00:19:18,892 --> 00:19:21,326 - OK, yes. 421 00:19:21,327 --> 00:19:23,195 - All right, take them back right away. 422 00:19:23,196 --> 00:19:24,496 - I'll get the carton. 423 00:19:24,497 --> 00:19:25,365 It's on the porch. 424 00:19:29,436 --> 00:19:35,074 But if you did George away, you can just give me away, too. 425 00:19:35,075 --> 00:19:38,110 - Look, Mitchell, now that Dennis is gone, 426 00:19:38,111 --> 00:19:40,546 why don't we grab the duck and jump in my car? 427 00:19:40,547 --> 00:19:42,681 Why, we can have him at the lake in three minutes. 428 00:19:42,682 --> 00:19:44,450 - I can't do it, Mr. Wilson. 429 00:19:44,451 --> 00:19:45,050 - Of course you can. 430 00:19:45,051 --> 00:19:46,485 Put on gloves. 431 00:19:46,486 --> 00:19:48,787 And if he bites it won't hurt. - That's not what I mean. 432 00:19:48,788 --> 00:19:50,189 I can't do it to Dennis. 433 00:19:50,190 --> 00:19:52,624 He's at least got to have a chance to say goodbye. 434 00:19:52,625 --> 00:19:56,095 - Well, then will you do it when Dennis gets back? 435 00:19:56,096 --> 00:19:57,496 - Maybe we ought to give him a few days 436 00:19:57,497 --> 00:19:58,697 to get used to the idea. 437 00:19:58,698 --> 00:20:00,799 Up until now I hadn't realized how important 438 00:20:00,800 --> 00:20:02,568 that duck was to him. 439 00:20:02,569 --> 00:20:04,970 - I warn you, Mitchell, if you go get rid 440 00:20:04,971 --> 00:20:08,741 of that confounded duck, I will! 441 00:20:08,742 --> 00:20:10,276 [music playing] 442 00:20:18,585 --> 00:20:20,186 [music playing] 443 00:20:44,377 --> 00:20:47,112 - That man. 444 00:20:47,113 --> 00:20:49,682 - Well, Martha, the traps all set. 445 00:20:49,683 --> 00:20:51,517 - George that trap is ridiculous. 446 00:20:51,518 --> 00:20:52,084 And you know it. 447 00:20:52,085 --> 00:20:53,085 - It is not. 448 00:20:53,086 --> 00:20:54,687 It's diabolically clever. 449 00:20:54,688 --> 00:20:58,323 I baited it with some of those seedlings that duck relishes. 450 00:20:58,324 --> 00:21:01,060 - How are you going to pull the string from in here? 451 00:21:01,061 --> 00:21:02,828 - Ah, that's the cleverest part. 452 00:21:02,829 --> 00:21:05,698 You see, I hung a cluster of those seedlings from a string. 453 00:21:05,699 --> 00:21:08,467 Now, when the ducks pulls on that, that trips the stick. 454 00:21:08,468 --> 00:21:09,168 Down comes the box. 455 00:21:09,169 --> 00:21:10,669 And I hear the bell. 456 00:21:10,670 --> 00:21:13,072 - What are you going to do with him if you catch him? 457 00:21:13,073 --> 00:21:16,442 - Well, when I catch him, I'll take him to the lake. 458 00:21:16,443 --> 00:21:17,776 [bell ringing] 459 00:21:17,777 --> 00:21:23,248 - Oh, when will you learn to 460 00:21:23,249 --> 00:21:25,551 I've already captured him. 461 00:21:25,552 --> 00:21:27,619 Say, how would you like to take a little drive over 462 00:21:27,620 --> 00:21:28,487 to the lake with me? 463 00:21:28,488 --> 00:21:29,321 - No, thank you. 464 00:21:29,322 --> 00:21:30,990 I don't approve of this at all. 465 00:21:31,091 --> 00:21:33,126 [music playing] 466 00:21:39,833 --> 00:21:40,766 [growling] 467 00:21:40,767 --> 00:21:43,535 - Who said ducks don't snarl? 468 00:21:43,536 --> 00:21:44,371 [growling] 469 00:21:47,974 --> 00:21:52,411 - Fremont, what are you doing in there? 470 00:21:52,412 --> 00:21:54,113 [bark] 471 00:21:54,114 --> 00:21:55,715 [music playing] 472 00:22:02,455 --> 00:22:04,958 - For heaven's sakes, George, You're a mess. 473 00:22:05,058 --> 00:22:06,725 - I've been up in the attic, Martha. 474 00:22:06,726 --> 00:22:08,060 - In your good slacks? 475 00:22:08,061 --> 00:22:09,328 - This was an emergency. 476 00:22:09,329 --> 00:22:11,330 I went up there to find this. 477 00:22:11,331 --> 00:22:12,131 - What is it? 478 00:22:12,132 --> 00:22:13,766 - This is my old duck call. 479 00:22:13,767 --> 00:22:15,734 Hunters use them to lure ducks. 480 00:22:15,735 --> 00:22:19,071 In my day, I was known as the best duck caller in the state. 481 00:22:19,072 --> 00:22:21,106 An old Indian guide taught me. 482 00:22:21,107 --> 00:22:24,443 - What are you going to do with it? 483 00:22:24,444 --> 00:22:27,079 - I am going to lure Dennis' duck out of his yard, 484 00:22:27,080 --> 00:22:28,480 and over to the lake in the park. 485 00:22:28,481 --> 00:22:29,548 It's a cinch. 486 00:22:29,549 --> 00:22:30,949 If Mitchell won't settle this thing, 487 00:22:30,950 --> 00:22:32,351 I'm going to solve this once and for all. 488 00:22:32,352 --> 00:22:34,620 - That's a silly way to do it. 489 00:22:34,621 --> 00:22:36,155 - You'll see, my dear. 490 00:22:36,156 --> 00:22:38,625 Ducks always found my technique irresistible. 491 00:22:41,628 --> 00:22:43,530 [quacking] 492 00:22:46,399 --> 00:22:48,100 - If you're going to make that silly noise, 493 00:22:48,101 --> 00:22:49,668 go outside with it. 494 00:22:49,669 --> 00:22:50,936 - And have Dennis see me? 495 00:22:50,937 --> 00:22:52,504 Oh no. 496 00:22:52,505 --> 00:22:54,740 I'm going to wait until the duck comes into our guard. 497 00:22:54,741 --> 00:22:57,142 And then I'll go out and lure him down the sidewalk 498 00:22:57,143 --> 00:22:59,478 and into the lake. 499 00:22:59,479 --> 00:23:03,549 [quacking] 500 00:23:03,550 --> 00:23:07,619 - This is the most ridiculous thing you've done yet. 501 00:23:07,620 --> 00:23:22,534 [quacking] 502 00:23:22,535 --> 00:23:25,738 - Dennis, that duck of yours is making an awful lot of noise. 503 00:23:25,739 --> 00:23:27,606 - That's not George. 504 00:23:27,607 --> 00:23:29,308 That's some other duck. 505 00:23:29,309 --> 00:23:31,978 My duck got all excited and tried to get out of the garage. 506 00:23:32,078 --> 00:23:34,747 So I locked the garage door. 507 00:23:34,748 --> 00:23:44,590 [quacking] 508 00:23:44,591 --> 00:23:45,992 - Will you stop it now? 509 00:23:46,092 --> 00:23:47,960 The duck isn't coming. 510 00:23:47,961 --> 00:23:48,927 - It'll come. 511 00:23:48,928 --> 00:23:50,329 You'll see! 512 00:23:50,330 --> 00:23:53,899 I'll just blow a little louder. 513 00:23:53,900 --> 00:24:14,054 [quacking] 514 00:24:27,067 --> 00:24:29,101 - George, don't just stand there! 515 00:24:29,102 --> 00:24:32,104 Catch them and take them outside! 516 00:24:32,105 --> 00:24:41,081 [quacking] - Whoa! 517 00:24:46,686 --> 00:24:47,319 - Martha! 518 00:24:47,320 --> 00:24:48,954 Come here! 519 00:24:48,955 --> 00:24:51,724 Look! 520 00:24:51,725 --> 00:24:52,492 - Hey, Mr. Wilson! 521 00:24:53,593 --> 00:24:54,594 Isn't this swell? 522 00:25:03,770 --> 00:25:07,841 [music playing]